I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
Randomize
