We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Randomize
