yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
