...so i touched it.
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Randomize
