PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
The sky will open, cue choir of angels: "oh! wow! Matt was right! Not only will I grow out my bush, but I'm going to date straight, available men!"
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
i like how i just referred to his pregnant wife as the "other" melissa and you didn't even judge me.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
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