I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
Randomize
