Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
Randomize
