guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
found the other keg... it's in the tree
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
Randomize
