didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
You need a sexual gate keeper
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
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