I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Randomize
