We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Randomize
