I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
