Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
Randomize
