No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
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