I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
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