let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
either way he was missing a nipple.
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
