your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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