we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
