I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
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