2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
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