Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
Randomize
