mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
I need to calm my uterus...
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
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