I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
