Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Randomize
