spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
Randomize
