I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize
