your parents love me but you hate me
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
They are going to name an STD after you.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
