I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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