No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
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