David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
They should really pass out barf bags in church
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
whose parrot is this?
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
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