Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
