she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize
