so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
You left your underwear on the fireplace
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
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