You're my little dorito
yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
Randomize
