I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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