i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
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