im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
Randomize
