Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
Randomize
