the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
Randomize
