Dude, this chick just tossed my salad hard. All that I could picture was a dog trying to get the last of the peanut butter out of the jar of Jiff and trying not to think of how grotesque my last dump was.
Then she tried to kiss me and I wouldn't and she got pissed off and went to sleep. Then about an hour later, her kid called her. She went home and on the way out I told her to wash her mouth before she kissed her kid good night. Weird night..
Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
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