Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Why do I fail so hard at ironing, when I'm a woman and i should be amazing at it?
because god found you far too good at oral sex and had to make all things even?
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
Randomize
