no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
Randomize
