Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
Randomize
