So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
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