At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
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