Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Randomize