Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
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