just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
Randomize
