I'm gonna have a badass scar
at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Randomize