Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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