you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
Randomize
